This introductory video shares my personal journey through years of confusion, emotional chaos, and depression — and how learning about narcissistic behavior, trauma responses, DBT, and CBT finally helped me understand what was happening in my life.
I’m not a clinician. I’m someone who lived through patterns I didn’t have words for at the time.
If you’ve felt blamed, confused, dismissed, or constantly on edge, you may recognize parts of your own story here.
This video is meant to give you clarity, language, and reassurance, and to help you take the first steps toward rebuilding your confidence and your sense of self.
You’re not alone — and you’re not imagining what you’ve been living through.
Welcome to the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Hub. Your healing starts here.
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Hub
If you feel confused, exhausted, blamed for things you didn’t do, or like you’re constantly walking on eggshells, you’re not alone. Narcissistic abuse is subtle, cyclical, and deeply destabilizing. This hub helps you understand the patterns, regain clarity, and begin rebuilding your sense of self — without judgment and without pressure.
What Narcissistic Abuse Actually Looks Like
Narcissistic abuse isn’t just yelling or name-calling. Most of the time, it shows up as manipulation, emotional instability, and behaviors that leave you doubting your memory, your intentions, and even your sanity. The most common patterns include:
- Gaslighting: Making you question your reality, memory, or emotional reactions.
- DARVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender — turning the story around to make you at fault.
- Projection: Accusing you of the very things they’re doing.
- Love-bombing and withdrawal cycles: Hot-cold behavior that keeps you unbalanced.
- Blame-shifting: Nothing is ever their fault, and everything becomes yours.
- Emotional unpredictability: Kind one moment, explosive the next.
You’re not “too sensitive,” and you’re not imagining things. These behaviors follow predictable patterns — and once you can name them, you can start reclaiming control over your emotional space.
DARVO: The Narcissistic “Flip” Technique
DENY
“That never happened.” “You’re making it up.” The goal is to erase your version of events.
ATTACK
The conversation shifts to your flaws, reactions, or tone — not their behavior.
REVERSE VICTIM & OFFENDER
They position themselves as the victim and you as the problem, aggressor, or abuser.
Understanding DARVO is one of the biggest breakthroughs people have when they start trauma recovery. Once you recognize the pattern, you stop absorbing the blame.
For a deeper dive into gaslighting and DARVO patterns, visit the Gaslighting & DARVO Explained page.
Why Narcissistic Abuse Creates Trauma
Narcissistic abuse causes trauma because it attacks your internal compass — your sense of reality, safety, and emotional predictability. Over time, this creates:
- Hypervigilance (“waiting for the next blow-up”)
- Self-doubt and confusion
- Shame and guilt that aren’t yours
- Exhaustion from chronic emotional management
- Difficulty making decisions
- Trauma bonding — attachment formed through unpredictable cycles
These reactions are not weakness. They are predictable responses to ongoing emotional instability.
Breaking the Cycle & Rebuilding Yourself
Healing doesn’t require the other person to change. It starts with clarity, boundaries, education, and support.
- Understanding the patterns (education reduces confusion)
- Creating emotional boundaries
- Reducing reactive behavior
- Stopping JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain)
- Developing a safety and communication plan
- Separating your identity from their reactions
You don’t need to handle this alone. The right tools help restore stability, clarity, and emotional distance.
Ready to Start Healing?
You don’t have to untangle this on your own. If you’re dealing with emotional volatility, gaslighting, or ongoing confusion, trauma-informed coaching can help you rebuild clarity and confidence step by step.
Explore 1-on-1 Trauma-Informed CoachingPTSD Recovery Starter Pack